Through my twenties and thirties I read a lot of self-help books, some Christian based and some not. I also attended many retreats and conferences. A common theme among these books, get-aways and even sermons I heard held the same statement that “your home is a reflection of you”. I would be eager to learn and apply all the latest organizing ideas, decorating tips, and diy projects. only to reach home and experience defeat. There was one problem, I didn’t live alone.

Not once did I hear from the stage or the page that the advisor lived with a “couch potato” and “spuds”. Nor did I hear it was okay to leave dishes in the sink. Don’t get me wrong I did gain a lot of great ideas that still hold true today. But it all came back on me and only me, which only fed my nature to control.

Not long into my journey of giving up control and cleaning I’ll never forget my Mother’s words as she entered my home. “in my house you could eat, off my floors” to which I replied “mine too, here’s some cheese, cracker crumbs etc”.

I actually went a little too far (we still have occasional buffet days at our house) and took on the attitude that if the people living with me didn’t care, then I wouldn’t either. Which actually spurned a little chore doing here and there from Hubs, and he gave the kids a few tasks to do as well. But their lack of doing it my way, sent me on a rant……so they stopped.

I’d like to say I’ve totally relaxed on the cleaning, but just last night I saw that I am not healed, but recovering. As Hubs and I sat down to watch a rented movie, with our popcorn and M&Ms I saw a few pieces of something on my freshly mopped laminate flooring, I got up and picked up the tiny debris and then went over the place with the mop again. As I finally settled in I said to Hubs, this new floor is gonna drive me insane it shows every speck of everything. He grinned and said “yep”. Later I was telling him to clean up his popcorn mess, but I didn’t tell him how to do it, and I didn’t go behind him and re-do it.

When we realize and accept that our home’s are the reflection of ALL who live there and every speck doesn’t need to be picked up, we will experience success not failure. When we acknowledge their way of cleaning is theirs, and accept their effort without re-doing it, we will have success. A little at a time we can lay down the control.

As always I welcome you to reply, and join me on the Patio!!!